(Title gleaned from my current music.)
A calm but somewhat directionless evening. I notice that I have a certain kind of faith that my new interest in focusing on violin and Chinese will bring me to a greater understand of my life. These two things might offer a method of psychic survival - furnish me with tools and arms against a complex, changing world.
I want to get back into looking at my life as a homestead, but I am not doing so quite so consciously now. I guess, in the spirit of the Homestead Act, I am doing a lot of good, hard work in improving the shelter I have recently been assigned to work at. I would like, someday, to augment that with a deeper knowledge and collaboration with the greater world. But I need to cultivate myself a little bit more to be a better receptacle.
I notice, at this moment, the very potent centering and focusing effect that writing has on me. It makes me consider how truly beneficial a large scale writing project would be for me . . .
But I will need to access it later. A feeling in my gut is telling me to slow down and stop. I am going to listen to this feeling that I might have struggled against in the past.
Good night, all.
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