Another successful night of centering journaling. I need to do more - eventually. I hope the memory of the grounded, open feeling that it created reminds me to keep doing it again and again. In the journaling itself it came out that I am very worried that I will forget to do things like this; it will get swept up in my daily life, my projects, agendas, fears, obsessions - and forgotten.
Part of the work is living through that fear. Being afraid. Making something real of that fear - the same as learning my weakness.
Also, it's important to remind myself that this is good in itself; this activity is valuable in itself. There is no next step. I am arriving every moment. I guess that's the opposite of gone ("gate") which is a Buddhist "ideal," but screw ideals.
I am hear.
Good night, everyone.
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