Some Day

Not a bad one, not a great one. I woke up extremely tired; opted for more sleep rather than more work. I went through my morning tasks all at once and then went straight to applying for jobs - rolled out three applications in only an hour. I decided to do my taxes, but infuriating ambiguities led my obsessive self to drive all the way to Tax Help NM so I could talk to a human - only to find it completely full and closed to new clients for the day. I managed to find some help, however, and got the answers I needed.

I took a quick nap, then did some work outside. There was not much to really do, so I went back in and did one more financial chore.  Then I exercised a little, did a little homework, went for a walk, had dinner and vegged a bit. I managed to squeeze in about 10 minutes of Python time, while listening to Poe's 1995 album Hello - something I got into back in middle school.

I am still listening to it, remembering the hope I had in myself at age 14 and how I am now. Everything that has proven to be sabotage was alive and well in me at the time - I can't claim that it was a purely better time or age.

But it sounds good. She's nostalgic for me and gives me a good sense of continuity, of having been different from what I am now and yet still alive. It's touching, too. It's a very sad album - but then, I've always loved sad music the best.

I feel quite hopeful, in fact. I feel like I have a strong grip on what at least the next steps are.

The full moon has a subtle effect on the light in my room; it is a splattering of bright sparks in the glass block windows behind my desk. I turned off my lamp, and now I can see it better; it has a stronger effect on the room.

Dream well, all.