Again, logging in, when I know it's so late that I'll begin drifting off during zazen afterward. Oh well.

I've temporarily lost interest in many of the issues plaguing me, due to focusing on Iceland logistics. I wrote the messages I needed to today and . . . they paid off. I now have places to stay around the entire island. Now my only challenges are: 1. Figuring out transportation 2. Finding suitable soaking spots. 3. Finding a good hotel to stay at for my birthday. I want to splurge. I wrote an e-mail to one place that looked great: Dimmuborgir Guesthouse. It's on the shores of Mývatn, which I hear is achingly beautiful in the winter, and surrounded by excellent hot springs. No response yet. I'll keep looking.

Anyway, I'm developing somewhat of an itinerary: Mossfellsbær (with daytrips to downtown Reykjavik), The Golden Circle (Geysir, Gullfloss, Þingvellir), Snæfellsness, Akureyri, Mývatn, Egilsstaður, Eyrarbakki, then Bláa Lónið (The Blue Lagoon) on my way back to the airport (if I didn't hit it on the way out)! It's all coming together.

I did chat with Sarah a tiny bit. I was not feeling it - not ready yet. We are tentatively scheduling a dinner together at Pho Kim, one of my new favorite restaurants in town. Sorry, Xiclo, you never made it in the door, somehow. I know I have things to say to her, but I'm really feeling like it's not a big deal right now. I've got better things to pay attention to, to pine over.

Interesting note: Kando, the leader of the zen group I've visited at the UU church a few times, turns out to be prominent plastic surgeon James Green. I don't think I really need to have an opinion about that, but it was interesting.

The group is infinitely convenient to me. There is a good atmosphere during the sitting. But I have to be honest - Kando talks too much for me, and there seems to be less interaction than I would like. I feel right now that this is fine; it's something I can deal with for the time being. However, if I ask myself what I really want out of a zen group, this is not quite it, and I think my qualms are valid: 1. I would like the atmosphere to be more egalitarian, with less of a sensei dynamic. 2. I would like it to be more actively social, with time for people to talk, chitchat, for us to get to know each other's names and say a little bit about why we practice and what problems we're having. Nothing too much, of course, but just something along those lines would be nice.

I had the opportunity to visit an NA meeting today. It was wonderful. I really feel that 12-step support groups are a good model for what people should be doing with their lives. That is, sharing them with others and spreading support all around for fellow mistake-makers and strugglers. Good lord, how much of that is missing from people's lives. There is a little bit of ceremony and theory that goes with 12-steps, but, really, it's people sharing their feelings, their struggles, and everyone in the group responding with gratitude, respect and lots of hugs. This sounds cheesy, but this stuff is crucial. Depression rates are on the rise; we're not taking care of each other emotionally. I hope I can go more often. I hope I can find a support group of my own, someday. Everyone needs one.

That will do for now.

Góða nótt!