Oh, it's a little late right now

Way late.

Another restless evening alone. I never made it out to Canyon Road. I was not, ultimately, too interested. It would have nice to have gone with friends, but nothing coalesced, and I was not going to try harder than I did.

I had some dinner, played some accordion, zoned out on video games for a while, did some pointless websurfing. Nothing horrible; nothing great.

I will be going to sleep soon. No ceremony this Christmas eve - but then again, when have I ever done anything significant for Christmas? Really, why is this a big deal for me, all of a sudden? Just because I feel lonely, I guess.

Really, Thanksgiving is my holiday. I need to emphasize that again. And I did a shitton for the Winter Solstice, which I've never done before but got quite a lot out of. Christmas? It's a "would be nice" kind of thing, but nothing I really need to worry about.

I had a pretty decent day, though, did some reading in the morning, a good run, then a few good hours spent with Abby and Hannah (she was there just for lunch).

I guess I was hoping for today to be busier, because I wanted to spend some time alone tomorrow, up until 3pm when I stop by the shelter for dinner. I can still do that - nothing's stopping me.

I want to note that I started writing a little melody on my accordion this evening - it made me feel sad and nostalgic. Nostalgia is good and arresting when you are busy - but it's important to remember to grieve for things that have passed away, and then to move on, move on, move on to the maelstrom of delight and sorrow that is the present moment. Ooh, how mystical. But true.

That will be all. I'm not entirely ready to sit quite yet - although it's so late that I will probably be pretty sleepy. But sit I will - in just a few minutes.

Night, all.